I Don’t Check Out the Moms’ Yoga Butts

You’re about to think I’m a bald-faced liar.

Apparently there’s a new show — Parenthood — in which a stay-at-home dad hangs out with a flirty hot mom.

Thanks, NBC, for that.

Television misses the mark whenever anyone’s profession is depicted; ask a hospital physician sometime how often their emergency department gets blown up by an off-course helicopter, a la ER

But, doing my due diligence, I did try to watch that SAHD-flirts-with-yoga-mom episode of Parenthood, but it was such a blown-up fantasy (alas, without actual explosions) that I got bored and drifted off.

It’s a common myth that there’s any flirtation (really, at all) in my line of work. I can totally hear you me-thinks-he-doth-protest-too-muching. Not so!

I’m serious!

I’m making it worse, aren’t I?

I recently fell into an accidental male-bonding moment with some working dads whose kids and wives I know from the playground. The conversation immediately turned to stay-at-home dadding, and, of course, how cool a job it must be.

Which it is, but one guy drove the specific point home: “Because you get to hang out with all those hot women!”

Mentally I was doing that “Uncomfortable Turtle” gesture that’s so hip with the kids right now, because, yipes, one of the ostensibly hot women he was talking about was his own wife.

He may have even said “chick.” Men amongst other men kind of suck.

I stuttered for a moment, but all I pulled out was that hardly anyone in the midst of his (or her!) parenting duties feels particularly hot. Being hot, being flirtatious, being desirable is just not on the table, unless the “desire” in question is in the form of gummi bears, and then the desirer is the kid, not the mom.

So sure, I happen to work in a female-dominated profession. (As I pretty much always have; I’ve never had a male boss.) But though I was a ridiculously huge flirt in my day, that’s just not something I bring to work.

Things work better when I try to be — well, not “just one of the women” of course, but let’s say, “just one of the parents.”

Not that, of course, you’re likely to believe me at all.