I’ve always used pretty much whatever comes into my head as a lullaby, but I knew I was scraping the bottom of the barrel — no, I’m under the barrel — when I started singing “Three Times a Lady” daily.
I blame Creative-Type Dad, whose Mother’s Day card coloring page started the whole thing:
Lionel Richie looks like Boo’s three grandfathers mixed together, so she took right to calling him “papa”. Naturally, when I asked her if she wanted to hear the song, she readily agreed.
So every day at nap time, as Boo finishes up her milk, I come up with a new extemporaneous verse to our ever-growing song. (I don’t know the actual words, you see.) One recent example:
Thanks for the moments you give to me,
The memories are nifty super keen
Thanks for getting your teeth brushed this morning,
And starting out the day so clean
Then you jumped in that massive mud puddle
And gave me a big slimy hug
You yelled toddler curse words at the duck statue,
Came home and peed on the rug
You’re once, twice, three times a lady….
I’ve self-consciously cleaned up the rhymes for this published version; at the moment of singing, the poetry is just a little forced (does “tantrum” rhyme with “knocked over the diaper pail”?).
There’s one great part about singing my faux-R&B ballad, which is that the last thing I say to her before every nap becomes:
I loooooooooooooooove you, I looooooooooooove you….
Now if only I could keep my voice from cracking trying to hit that low note.