After a week of wondering if I should tell Working Mom about this blog, I finally turned to Park Buddy for advice. I think I made the blog sound pretty bad, because Buddy’s response was essentially “No frikkin’ way,” albeit much more eloquently put.
Then she read some of it, though — in fact, she’s probably here now.
Everybody say “Hi, Park Buddy!”
And after she read it, Buddy reassured me that there’s nothing so horribly bad about it, that in fact a few of the entries are kind of nice to my wife.
So I was all set to tell Working Mom about it — just a few more edits first, puh-leeeese! — when she came home from work yesterday and said, “Hi, Doodaddy! How’s Boobaby?”
It turns out I had sent her a link to some other blog where I’d commented using the pseudonym, which she clicked on and discovered, well, this. So Working Mom is here now, too.
Everybody say “Hi, Working Mom!”
And yes, as predicted by Park Buddy and countless others, she thought it was no big deal. She even liked some of the posts — “Have I Mentioned How Much I Love My Wife?“, for example. Looks like I dusted and swept the doghouse for nothing: I am not banishÃ©d.
When we were talking about it, though, my wife asked me a question I hadn’t thought about beforehand:
“So, do you want me not to read it?”
Basically, she’s offering, now that she’s got the gist of the thing, to let it go. And I don’t really know if I want that. Moobs (in an interview with CrankMama that’s well worth checking out) talked about his dilemma as the male half of a couple struggling to get pregnant:
On those occasions when I feel the need to vent, your options as a man are pretty limited. So if you’re down at the pub after a football game and you say, “Yeah, that’s a very interesting point, now may I turn the conversation ’round to in vitro fertilization…” There is no quicker way of clearing a public house in my experience.
When you start blogging, you have no reason to believe anyone’s going to be reading it. You’re just sending your message out into the blankness, and the actual process of doing that is therapeutic… and that explains partly why I’ve asked Penny from the outset not to go reading the blog: because it would to some extent defeat the purpose. It allows me, without upsetting her and maintaining our balance of responsibilities as a couple to express on occasion how I feel about things without that causing her upset. And to some extent that would be frustrated if she were monitoring it on a weekly basis.
How is it that some people are so eloquent? And this was extemporaneous, too.
I hardly think that my need for an “outlet” measures up to Moobs’. Nonetheless, for now, I think I’ll ask my wife not to read this on a regular basis, and just send her stuff from time to time. I’ve got to say, though, the very fact that she’s being so reasonable about this is making me feel like I’ll never need to post anything frustrating about her again, anyway.
Well, maybe someday. Time will tell.