Things not to say when you come home an hour and a half late from work to Doodaddy who’s been dealing with erupting molars, doing taxes, and cleaning avocado out of the carpet all day

“Hey, honey, you put her dress on backwards this morning.”

I like it better that way, dear.

“What’s for dinner?”

Anything that comes in little take-out cartons.

“Please don’t hang the clothes I leave out on the bed.”

You’d prefer incineration, maybe?

__Sorry for the rant, all. Long day.