Lessons on the Chillaxophone

by doodaddy on March 20, 2009

I ran into the same Crazy Park Lady who used to blow air horns at dog owners (thus scaring the bejeezus out of children at the adjoining playground). Today, she was harassing two four-year olds for playing on a hill that she apparently felt was off-limits.


Gratuitous cute baby picture.
Just because I can.

I think her excuse was “habitat restoration” (um, no: no such restoration in evidence) but I couldn’t hear much over my internal voice, which was at that moment screaming “STAY AWAY FROM THE FRIKKIN’ KIDS.”

There are ways to approach other people’s children in public. Unless said child is about to fall on parking lot spikes or something, all those ways go through the parents or caregivers. Predictably, her ranting did nothing but make two children cry and piss off their parents.

And me? I managed to just sit off to the side, chuckle at Crazy Park Lady’s latest antic, and — apart from a quick reminder to myself to threaten a restraining order if she ever goes near my children — mostly relax about it.

People are busybodies by nature. The more so when there are kids involved: we carry a primal instinct to guide (or control) children, even those of the rest of the tribe. I could let that bug me — OK, fine, I usually let that bug me — or, like today, I could just acknowledge that the world is full of crazy but harmless people, and Boo and her friends need to learn about them, too.

From whence this laid-back, philosophical approach? Beats me, but I’m sure it won’t last long: a week, tops, before I’m back to my usual (and charmingly winning) indignation.

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tagged as in playground,strangers,unsolicited advice ·

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Xbox4NappyRash March 21, 2009 at 3:25 am

You could have told us you were marching on the Polish border in that post and I wouldn’t have read it.



Nan March 22, 2009 at 6:28 pm

I once said loudly to someone, “Oh, wow, GREAT JOB! You made the BABY cry! You are so much BIGGER and SMARTER than them! Let’s go see if we can find some MORE babies and make THEM cry!!!”

Which was totally dumb because it made the baby in question even more confused and upset. But it forever alienated the grownup and they never spoke to me or my babies again, which was absolutely awesome.


Georgia May 3, 2009 at 11:00 pm

Hey Graham, Georgia here, enjoying reading your blog and we are all too familiar w/crazy dog park lady- not to mention that you’re not supposed to be on a playground without kids (or dogs!) right? What’s she doing there? She made my daughter cry for walking our little tiny 7 lb. dog on a leash- she’s a big nut! See you and your gals soon!


doodaddy May 3, 2009 at 11:03 pm

@Georgia – Our park is (alas!) multi-use, so anyone can be on the lawn or driveway or tennis courts, dog or kid or no. Which if everyone’s cool would be just great — I mean, we’re a friendly neighborhood, right? Except sometimes, well, not so much.

Glad you found the blog!


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