Alas, it’s not what you think. I’m referring to Mike, who brought along the Veggie Pirate’s Booty for the girls for a day of hanging out at our new local playground.
Good thing Mike brought this…
…and not this!
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That wasn’t all of today’s booty, though. Right in front of their seven-month old dangling on the baby swings, a daddy and a mommy (I hope) were makin’ out. Here I leave off the ‘g’ intentionally: these two evident adults were "makin’ out" in a way that you pretty much only witness among sweaty teenagers in front of the Burger King just before their 10 p.m. curfew. Daddy was, I kid you not, massaging mamma’s left buttock like it was a risen whole wheat loaf. In the middle of a full-to-crowded playground, no less.
With mingled disgust, amusement, and (it must be said) a little bit of envy of the young at heart, I called the horn-doggery to Mike’s attention. He almost got a picture of it on his phone (it was going on long enough!), but couldn’t quite get the angle.
It’s a good thing Mike didn’t bring the Pirate’s Cannon Balls today. You never know what might have happened.
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
Pirate booty, indeed! It’s good to hear that parenthood doesn’t necessarily crimp everyone’s sex lives. Can’t say I’ve seen much pdpa (public displays of parental affection) in these parts, but good to know it’s out there. Keep up the good work, doodad, and thanks for including me in your blogroll. I’ll do the same on my end. Cheers!
Dana Glazer
Director
The Evolution of Dad Project
http://www.evolutionofdad.com
Wow. I have a seven-month-old, and I wish I felt like making out in public. (Mental note: must get more sleep. Also, compare buttocks to whole wheat loaves in mirror.)
Just a hint: I meant the *unbaked* loaves. Who would knead them once they’re baked?
Note to self….go hang out in front of Burger King late at night.
Ever chaperone a high school dance? It’s about the same… like something out of a nature video.
EEEWWW. I mean, I don’t begrudge them their happy lust, but still…at a playground? It’s a bit odd, and somehow disquieting.
And, are those Pirate’s Cannon Balls for real? I’ve never seen them before! We love the Pirate’s Booty products at our house.
They are totally real and I almost want to order some. I have no idea what they would be — very large Booty? Which is all the more fun. “Give me the big Booty! I want the big Booty!” See what I mean?
I don’t have it in me to make out like a teenager anymore.